For a couple of days I've been thinking that it might help to take Devin for a walk in the stroller at times when he's fussy and hard to sooth. This morning the stroller was ready, it wasn't too hot out yet, I was dressed and Devin was fussy. Liam wasn't actually dressed, but he was willing to quickly get dressed and we set off (with a minimum discussion of whether he should take the leftover pizza and/or chocolate bar he'd been about to eat).
He was very interested in which way we were going and when he would get to push the stroller. I'd warned him that it would be a short walk, but when a truck went by and Devin started to cry I turned around and headed toward home. When we got near the house and Devin was asleep I took another turn and we ended up walking around the block. This, as it turned out, was somehow not what Liam had thought we would do when we took a walk. He complained that it wasn't any fun. When I told him that he used to love walking around the neighborhood and didn't care where we went or why he said, "Well now I care."
On the way home a neighbor down the street asked if we needed any zucchini. I said we could use some and he offered us some green beans if we picked them. Liam found this fun and interesting, but Devin got tired of laying in the stationary stroller and started to cry. By the time we got home Devin was screaming and Liam NEEDED his drink - NOW. When I told him that whining about it wouldn't help he started crying and seemed to go ballistic. I finally figured out that he was trying to keep moving fast enough to stay warm so that he could still have a cold drink when I was done feeding Devin. I suggested he go back outside.
Later he got cold and wanted to snuggle. Devin was asleep in a swing but I was sitting in the rocking chair which doesn't have a lot of extra room and I told Liam I didn't think I could handle snuggling. He cried. I suggested he put on a jacket which helped. Then he went and got socks. One of the boys seemed destined to be the wrong temperature.
Days like today feel like a marathon to me. While Devin slept I worked on a puzzle with Liam. I realized he was probably done with the puzzle when he started making this "house" complete with a detailed narration of his activities. I told him I was going to lay down on the couch for a while but did not allow him to watch Netflix videos which upset him. He went into his room. A little later I thought I heard the back storm door opening. I went to check just in time to see Liam closing the house door - from the outside. He had very quietly removed his socks and jacket, put on his shoes and gone outside. He said he didn't want to wake me up. He had another meltdown about the fact that I told him firmly that he's never allowed to leave the house without telling me and no, he could not go outside right then.
Devin slept through the commotion. We have borrowed a new swing and either it's much more comfortable than the old one or he's taking longer naps because he slept for a couple of hours.
Then we went outside and Liam buried himself in the sand while Devin nursed and contemplated the leaves of the maple tree and I tried to relax and enjoy the breeze and the soft, rain-on-the way feel of the air.
As we were finishing supper I mentioned to Allen that the sheets on the bed needed to be changed and he offered to go do it. Liam objected. I decided to try (again) to address his seeming belief that he is/should be the one in charge around here. After I told him that we try to give him lots of choices but sometimes Mommy and Daddy have to decide what is going to happen (like right now when Daddy is going to leave - which he did) Liam said, "I wish I was you."
I said, "Really, so you can wake up during the night with the baby, then get up and take care of two little kids all day, then go to bed and do it again?"
He said, "No, I wish I was Daddy. I'm a boy. I'll be a daddy. What's so funny?"
He didn't get the point, though because he wailed "NOOOO!" in a voice that could break glass when he found out that Daddy, rather than Mommy was going to give him a bath.
Tomorrow I have a OBGYN appointment, Allen has a meeting and Liam has kindergarten orientation. But next week he starts kindergarten in the afternoons. Maybe having a more regular schedule will help us establish expectations that won't leave me feeling like I've been arguing all day long. And maybe we won't have a repeat of last night where Devin woke up at 9:00 and was awake and fussy until 11:30. Here's hoping.
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